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Thursday, November 28, 2013

Giving Thanks



This is exactly what I needed. I stumbled on this on the Internet as I tried to divert my mind from dwelling on sad things and be proactive. It's not that I want to be sad. It's just that sometimes it seems to be my default setting. I know that I have much to be thankful for. Yet I get lost in the past or the future rather than being - as they say - "here, now."

The sadness that had me in its grip was a jumble of things. Missing people who are no longer here, missing opportunities no longer available, questioning the twinges and whatnot that have inevitably settled in as time passes and my body ages. And more things dealing with the past. And to give the future its due, worry about what is in store as those twinges and whatnot may develop into full blown diagnosable things, anticipated sorrow at not being able to do things and progressive slowing, plus the relentless loss of my peers and friends. Yet today, I am in neither of those places so need to shake them off. 

What I'm feeling is the result of things I had no control over (like my genetic make up and where I grew up) plus the result of choices I've made (such as the jobs I've taken and the relationships I've avoided.) My sadness or dissatisfaction with those things is - at the core - sadness or dissatisfaction with myself.

My mother was a very wise women. One who lived with at least occasional depression I'm pretty sure, yet of a generation that didn't become obsessed with "feeling" it or allow it to debilitate her. She was of the school that if she was feeling down, she needed to get busy. I'm not sure  it mattered with what, but just busy - cleaning, cooking, sewing, doing laundry, visiting with her parents, writing a letter to an elderly aunt. All things that got her out of herself and were done with at least a partial if not full focus on others. At the time I saw her life as drudgery, lacking excitement and fulfillment. It wasn't flashy and she wasn't famous or doing "important" things. Now I know that she was doing the most important thing of all - doing what she could that was needed by others. Appreciated by them - too often silently. And she was living a good life. When I remember that I can snap to the present and leave the past and the future alone, at least for a while.  This Thanksgiving, my thanks are for her.



Thursday, November 21, 2013

Further thoughts on my "year of yes"...

FOUND IN DRAFT FOLDER (it was written 8/31/13) - MY BAD!


Yesterday was my birthday. A few years back in the weeks leading up to that day I was pretty miserable, and now I understand why. I thought I understood then, but I think I was wrong.

Then I was facing one of those momentous birthdays. A "big 0" birthday. The ones that clearly - particularly as the number before the "0" gets larger - mark progression if not progress. Progression is inevitable and over time it became quite obvious that the progress didn't match my plans. And my ability to make up for lost time was slipping away. Such a view is clearly a "half full" one. Possibly even a lot less than half full.... From such a perch it was easy to fall into a loop of negative thoughts that even further limited whatever was possible. My attitude was quite negative and was leading me into a "year of no." I can't. It's too late. It's not worth...you get the idea. I put the losses of aging in the front seat with me on my remaining ride.

Now, after having gone through more than half of my "year of yes" things appear very different. Consciously choosing to look at the positive aspects whatever happens, while seemingly Pollyanna-ish, has allowed me to do more. Rather than being mired in inaction and all the "can'ts", I've embraced opportunities and invitations to act that I would never have expected. Working with people on planning events, starting organizations and more. These were things I didn't see in my future but were grabbed the moment they appeared. Having a plan to the future is good. Being blindered to any other than a single route to get to that future was a recipe for sadness. Opportunities and invitations rather than losses are now in that front seat with me. The trip is much more pleasant.

Saying yes to things has proved to be a wonderful antidote to the reality of time passing. Let it pass. Who knows what it will bring?


Donations, De-Stuffing and Guarantees


Old lights  - nice and bright
New lights - a bit subdued even though bigger

As part of year-end planning, I had a conversation with my financial adviser and my tax adviser. Seeing that written looks pretentious. I don't have tons of money. However I decided long ago that I wouldn't have any if left to my own devices. I wasn't a spendthrift and saved regularly, but wasn't interested in investing the way others in my family were, and banks were not the places where funds left on deposit would grow significantly. And since I wasn't the kind of risk taker who would tackle starting a business, there seemed to be wisdom in having someone advise me on how to manage my money. It was a good decision. But back to the conversation...

Part of the conversation was trying to guestimate what I will owe in taxes and if there is anything that can be done between now and the end of the year - let me be quick to say, legally - to minimize those taxes. As a result of that conversation I began a serious round of collecting items to donate. I do this other times during the year, and truthfully have not been as ruthless in weeding things out as I should be. I have (I think we all have) too much stuff. So on the hunt I went.

While doing this I happened to be checking email and saw something from The Triple Pundit (I think) about swapping out incandescent Christmas lights for LED lights. There was a monetary incentive to do this and I knew they would use less energy and be cooler on the tree, thus less risky as the tree dried out over the holidays. While clearing out my old lights didn't fall into the category of a donation, it would still accomplish the second goal of de-stuffing my home.

The Christmas lights I've been using on my tree are very dear to me. They were used when I was growing up and seeing them in the box and on the tree reminds me of my father, my mother, my childhood, my home, well, you get the idea. They are a part of me. I didn't want to turn loose of them. Yet, intellectually, I knew it was the right thing to do. Or was it?

That question arose after I made the trip to the store to do the swap. I'd screwed up the gumption to trade five strands of my lights for five strands of LED lights. In perusing the too-many choices (don't get me started, that's another issue) I saw that lights carried a range of guarantees for how long they should be expected to last. The guarantees ranged from one year to seven years. Huh!? The lights I was giving up had lasted more than 50 years and were still going strong. This screamed planned obsolesence!

I suppose the argument is that technology is changing so fast that it doesn't make sense to make things that last a long time. But at what cost? What is lost in this mentality is the pride of workmanship that made it possible to hand down Great Grandma's sewing machine or Uncle Harry's roll top desk. They were made to work. To look good. And to outlast their owners. Now, not so much. Maybe today's humans feel threatened by things that outlast them. I don't know. But I do know that I still value things that will outlast me. I don't need the newest and shiniest things to be happy or feel successful. And I think Christmas lights that are still working after 50+ years are to be celebrated.

So did I swap out the lights? Some, not all. I'm not a total Luddite. I know the benefits of LED lights are real. At the same time I know the value of long-lasting products, like fond memories, are real too. Both need to be kept and handed down.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Confused Flora



I believe in climate change. I have for a long time. Although I don't have deep technical, scientific knowledge of the issue, I don't know that I need it to see an impact close to home. The potential for radically changing the growing season. In my lifetime.

For several seasons an arrow-head type plant in my front garden has grown far too late into the season after having died out and assumed that the brief cold snap was winter and the sure-to-be brief warm snap justified popping up out of the earth again.

But today, while walking, I saw what is in the picture above. Buds on a nearly dead rose bush, on November 10th. Buds sitting side by side with massive rose hips from dead roses and spotty leaves that appear just about to give up the ghost. Clearly the plant seems pretty confused. If roses are confused it's sad. If food crops are confused, and don't fully complete their growth cycles, then what?

Monday, November 4, 2013

Pop up poster show - Day 2




The first seasonal (Fall) show of Lexicon of Sustainability posters ended and quietly disappeared, leaving no physical trace of its presence. No trash. No damage. A simple end.

However it did leave some things behind. It left an energy behind to continue lots of conversations with new connections. And it left other people with next steps for projects in their backyards that promote local, sustainable food. And too, it sparked ideas for how people could work together to get more done collaboratively than they could alone, all without reinventing wheels. The two-day show was a start. It's up to everyone to keep the momentum going.

Watch the Art of Sustainability Facebook page for information on where you can see more posters at the Winter Pop Up Show.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Pop up poster show - Day 1

One of the posters from the show November 2 -3, 2013 in Three Oaks. More information here.


Yesterday was the first day of the Lexicon of Sustainability pop up poster show in Three Oaks. The weather - sadly - didn't cooperate. It was mostly drizzly and got colder over the day. Overcast, dull and gray. Yet there were some hardy folks who came out to see the show and talk to those of us who were there. And in the venues, Edington Gallery and Pleasant House, chance patrons who knew nothing about the show saw it, engaged with it and perhaps one of the hosts. And so it starts.

Then a few of us stayed to continue the conversation around the Viking Table at Journeyman. 

Today, we start again. It's sunny and promises to be warmer for the show's second day. Fingers crossed for a bigger crowd and more conversations. The topic is important. Although the show had no specific outcome in mind other than focusing attention on the importance of our local food system and the meaning of sustainability, that itself is a big goal.

Today at 6pm the show disappears (although the issues it raises don't.) But mark your calendar for the next pop up show - January 18 and 19 at Journeyman - and more terms from the Lexicon of Sustainability. In the meantime, you can contribute to the conversation at the Art of Sustainability Facebook page (link is above under the image...)