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Thursday, December 13, 2012

Another year...




It's almost time to turn the calendar page to yet another new year. Have slipped over the top of the mountain quietly and as I tread down its far side, I find it remarkable that this journey, this life, has been what it has. In so many ways nothing at all like I think my parents would have expected for me - or maybe even hoped and wished for me. But they couldn't have seen what the world has become. Its interconnectedness and complexity. Yet the things they could envision are things I want. I want a simple life, good food, good friends and roof over my head. But the way in which I have managed to acquire and hold on to these things, that is where I think my parents' dream for me and my dream of my own life parted ways.

They were traditionalists and expected me to marry, settle down, raise a family and live my life. I was non-traditional from their perspective (no matter that I probably fit well in my own time) in that I pursued a career, stayed single, traveled around and, based on feedback I've received, was considered successful. But funny thing, aside from that "raise a family" hope they held, the life I live now is probably exactly what they would have expected me to do from the start. But I couldn't. Wouldn't. Didn't.

Maybe what I wanted changed. Maybe I only wanted something totally different from my parents' life simply because that life didn't seem exciting. Whatever happened, I find myself discovering with every turn of the calendar page to a new year that I see more value in the way they lived than I could see before, and am consciously choosing it. And will most likely continue to do that until I'm fully down off the mountain.

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