Tempus fugit and choices

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The old adage about time flying is too true. It seems to move much more swiftly and fluidly than in days past. Perhaps because fewer days lie ahead than behind. Not a lament, just an honest appraisal. Yet for whatever reason, the days slip by and good intentions, even accomplishments, feel inadequate. Just a few more minutes here or there, please. Another day before the project is due. But no, it can't happen.

There is no shortage of problems to try to rectify, experiences to learn from and events to share with friends (most family no longer here). Yet there isn't enough time to do them all, so we choose. And our choices don't always meet with others' approval. Perhaps they see strengths or abilities in us that we either don't see, may choose to let stand, or apply elsewhere. Yet our choices can't possibly meet the approval of everyone because they are, after all, choices. This, not that. Tomorrow, not now. Or even more finally, no, not at all.

Alternately there are the things we say yes to. Yes, this. Yes, today. Yes, I will. Choices we hope will bring us satisfaction at least, joy at best. Your choices may not be the ones I would make, yet your choices are not mine to make. Nor are mine yours to make. Obvious? Yes. Frequently forgotten? It seems so. And there is no guarantee that anyone's choice is good. An ancient Chinese story illustrates that:

A farmer and his son had a beloved stallion. One day, the horse ran away and a neighbor commiserated, “Your horse ran away, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”

A few days later, the horse returned, leading a few wild mares back to the farm. The neighbor shouted out, “Your horse returned, and brought others. What great luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”

Later that week, the farmer’s son was trying to break one of the mares and she threw him, breaking his leg. The neighbor cried, “Your son broke his leg, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”

A few weeks later, the army marched through town conscripting able-bodied men. The farmer's son was left behind with his broken leg. The neighbor shouted, “Your boy is spared, what tremendous luck!” To which the farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”

No event (or choice) in and of itself, can truly be judged as good or bad, lucky or unlucky, appropriate or inappropriate. Only time will tell the whole story and unfortunately, it is rare that anyone gets to live long enough to learn the "whole story." So in this Year of Yes I choose not to squander precious time judging others' choices. With luck, others will afford me the same freedom. And maybe we all will be a bit happier.